So begins the longest slow speed
chase since OJ Simpson in the Bronco.
Somehow the resistance ships are able to pull just a little ahead of the
First Order ships, but they're not able to gain any more space than that. I'm not sure how that works, but that's what
they claim is happening.
They're also steadily running out of
fuel. Now, a lot of people have pointed
out that this is the first time fuel is mentioned in the Star Wars
universe. That's not true. You see ships being fueled up in several
movies, and you can pretty much assume in any film that ships need fuel. That's not the problem.
The problem is, why would they not
have taken more fuel with them? Even if
they were escaping in a hurry, you'd imagine that, these being republic ships,
they're going to be pretty well fueled.
But the really baffling part comes
when Rose sees Fin. First, I'm not sure
why Rose would be a fan of his because he didn't do anything on the Star Killer
Base that would have warranted attention.
But that's beside the point.
What's truly baffling is what she's doing there; keeping people from
escaping. But... that's the whole point
of what they're trying to do. Leia even
says later in the film that if at least one person escapes, they can be the
spark that reignites the rebellion and restores freedom to the galaxy. Well then, why not jam the escape pods full
of people, launch them, and send them all in different directions. For that matter, why not have the capitol
ships all fly in different directions.
They also apparently have a transport ship that has enough fuel for
several jumps as Fin and Rose leave and return on it. I can't imagine that would be the only one of
those transports on board, so use another one.
They could also call Rey back and fill the Falcon with people and have
that fly in yet another direction.
You might be countering this with
two things. First, that the escape pods
don't have jump drive ability, which I would be with you on, but if that's the
case, why did four people and Fin try to use them to escape in deep space? Clearly they have hyperspace
capabilities. Second, there are enough
First Order ships to follow each of them.
But they make it very clear that only one of them can track them. So if the resistance just split up, the First
Order could only follow one of them.
But then comes one of the most face
palming elements of the entire movie, and it baffles me that I haven't heard
anyone else talk about this problem. So
apparently they can only get through the First Order shields with a code
breaker, and in the entire galaxy, only two people can do it, Maz, and this
person she knows. Maz tells them she
can't do it because she's involved in a labor dispute. She says this while she's exchanging gunfire
with someone.
So... Let me get this straight. Maz is... shooting at her employees, and
they're shooting back at her.
Seriously. This is one of the
good guys, the owner of a bar who is literally shooting at her employees
because of a labor dispute... Huh. I'm
afraid to ask what she does to an employee if they arrive five minutes late. Also, supposedly she could break this code,
but she's too busy to do that because of this labor dispute. Nice to know that an employee strike at a bar
takes precedence over saving the entire galactic republic. Used to be a time when the rebellion versus
the Empire meant something. But now,
it's all about who wants a day off or a raise.
So Rose and Finn are off to the
casino planet where they wax poetic about slavery and cruelty to animals. Now, I relate to their plight for
animals. My girlfriend and I foster cats
and are big into animal rescues. It's an
important issue to us. But if Nazis were
about to take over the world, I think I'd be a little more concerned with
stopping them than whether or not someone was whipping a horse.
In
fact, when Rose sets one of the animals free and it runs into a field, I
couldn't help but think of how it would look in an episode of The
Simpsons. It disappears into the tall
grass, then we see a ship come down from above and scoop the animal up. You see, setting the animals free in that
moment wouldn't do anything. All they
accomplished was to inconvenience the slavers for a little bit. The way to stop them would be to restore the
republic and have that republic make these activities illegal. You know, that republic that Rose and Fin are
supposed to be saving, but might not because they're temporarily setting a few
horses free?
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