It's Difficult to Move on to the Next Project When You've Failed

I've failed a lot of times.  So many times it's hard to imagine succeeding anymore.  I would even say that being this used to failure gets in the way of success because I'm expecting to fail.

But hope is always on the horizon when you have that project coming up that's supposed to be the big success.  What happens, though, when that project comes and goes and it still wasn't a success?

That's when true depression and lack of confidence kicks in.

I recently heard Dan Harmon wax poetic about what an artist does when they've gotten everything they want.  I couldn't help but ask, what happens when an artist has done everything they expect to work, and they still can't succeed?  That is the true existential crisis of an artist.

I've been going through that crisis lately.  It affects everything I do.  Any time I sit down to write, there's a voice in my head that says, "Why are you bothering?  You tried this before and it didn't work?  What's the point?"

I don't have an answer to that.  I hope I do soon, because my vacation of self-pity needs to be over and I have to get back to work.  But even on a night like tonight when I have a ton of time and my girlfriend's gone so there are no distractions, I'm having difficulty turning that part of my brain off and getting to work.